Archive for July, 2008

Back to Basics

{ July 31, 2008 @ 3:47 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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Well I quit my job with Jill’s On McGill, most of you already know that. But I went back to Montana’s….shocking! I was offered a better position and more money, plus I won’t be doing any work as a prep cook unless Ilonka is gone on vacation! YAY! I work way more hours too but the downside again is that I don’t see Jeff or Jacob much anymore. Between Jacob being between daycare and babysitters, I see him only a few hours a day :(

I have been back for about 2 weeks and only had a few problems with one girl…she’s SO slow and gives everyone attitude when we tell her what needs to be done. I had a talk with her on Tuesday before she started her shift and she was fine while I was talking to her…I was super nice about it but once I turned my back she did nothing but complain about it. I hate two faced people. I don’t work with her until…Saturday I think and it’ll be interesting to see how it goes. If I get any more attitude I’ll be taking Sam, Suzy & Jess’s advice and start screaming. I really should start, I hate being so nice.

Jacob’s not being potty trained anymore. We figure we’d back off for a bit since we’re starting a whole new routine for him and he should get used to things. It’s going pretty good, he’s went on the potty twice all by himself so far. Pretty good I’d say. The last time, Jeff was home with the stomach flu (we all were last week) and Jacob turned on the bathroom light, peed on the potty, grabbed a new pull up and smacked Jeff over the head with it. Jeff called me freaking out because he was so happy…and I yelled out my Proud Parent moment to all the cooks on the line when I had talked to Jeff.

Cleaning is hell. I’ve been working so much that I’m barely sleeping (getting home between 11 and 12, sleeping an hour later, waking up with Jacob around 6am everyday) and I don’t have energy to clean. We had a big mess in our kitchen so today I finally had enough and cleaned the whole apartment, right down to the bathroom floor being scrubbed. I’m all sticky and sweaty….YUCK! My cat doesn’t like me too much right now, she hates the vacuum and I was pretty much chasing her with it LOL no intentionally but each time she’d run into a room, I’d have to follow her and do the floors. Very funny!

My parents came up to visit the same week I started back at Montana’s. I was upset that I didn’t get to spend anytime with them but they promised to come back for another visit when I have time off. I’ll be letting them know about my schedule and they’ll come when I have two or more days off. I can’t wait! I plan on going to 100 Mile in September for a few days. See my family, visit with them and possibly see some old friends. I miss watching Jacob, Kirsten & Ryan play. Corina lives in town and I can’t wait to see Jacob run around in her backyard with Ryan in tow. I miss Nanny (my Grandma) too.

Monday (Aug 4th) is Jeff & I’s anniversary. First wedding anniversary and fourth anniversary all together. We’re not doing anything that day since we both have to work but on the 5th we’re heading off to see The Dark Knight together. We’ve never been to a movie in a theater together…strange I know. Come to think of it, I’ve never been to a theater here..ever. Hard to believe we’ve been married a year…where’d the time go? Extremely hard to believe that Jacob will be 3 in November! Where the **** did my baby boy go??

Anyway, I’m sticky..sweaty and in desperate need of a shower before I go pick Suzy up to come over for dinner. YAY! SUZY!!!

Updates

{ July 10, 2008 @ 9:23 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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I haven’t managed to fully quit smoking yet. I’ve tried and tried but it’s just not in the cards at the moment.

We’re also potty training Jacob….O god! What an adventure that is. He’s pretty good at holding it all night (which he did all by himself before we started potty training) and most of the time he’s good at going first thing in the morning. Our biggest problem is when he comes into our room first thing in the morning, we just want to stay in bed and cuddle with him and unfortunately, that doesn’t work with potty training him. But we’re giving him rewards for going on the potty and we have one of those ones that play music when he goes. We just have to get the pee down before we start working on the poop. That’ll be lovely!

I quit my job at Jill’s On McGill because the boss was screaming and swearing at me about a high end catering job. And it’s been about a month since I worked. I was talking to my old boss, well one of them, and inquired about getting a job again at Montana’s. So on Tuesday I went to have a meeting (smoke on the patio with Michael) and he was VERY excited to hear that I wanted to come back. He even made it so I won’t be doing prep on the weekends and I’ll be the one replacing the prep bitch when she goes on vacation. I’m getting paid more money than I was the last time, which he also offered me. It’ll be nice! I’ll also be getting more hours in a sense too. I start on Wednesday. My daycare lady even said she’d watch Jacob while I worked in the evenings and will drive Jacob home afterwards when Jeff gets home. SWEET!!! Now all I have to do is nail down this weekend babysitter and we’ve got ourselves a good time.

Things with Jeff & I have been….OK. The usual fights and squabbles but what married couple doesn’t have those? Our first wedding anniversary is in less than a month and we won’t be doing the usual giving of the gifts either. We’ll be opening up a savings account and every month we’ll be putting $20 in it and will NOT touch it. Every anniversary we will decide how it will be spent on us as a couple. Another thing we’ll be doing is setting goals and actively pursuing them. For me it’ll be weight loss with a realistic amount. For Jeff, I’m not sure what he plans on doing. We’ll keep track of any weight loss each week and work out solutions on how to keep it up. Eating better, going out for walks, exercising when we can, taking better care of ourselves. I’m serious about this now. No more beating around the bush or making excuses. This time will be different.

Hello Old Friend

{ July 3, 2008 @ 12:48 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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Mr Depression came back into my life recently. I ache all over and hate myself for being such a pig. I’m ashamed to dress in anything because I have a voice inside my head telling me what people think when they look at me. I went into a store the other day to pick up dinner and everyone was staring at me, they’d look away for a second or two then stare at me again. I kow there’s alot of people out there far worse than I am but I just can’t shake these thoughts.

I’m a horrible person for thinking these thoughts.

I’ve been distancing myself from friends lately because I get so upset so easily. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m that girl from high school that no one can stand but they keep in contact with her out of pity. I look at everyone else’s pictures on Facebook and they’re so happy. They have money to pay bills and they have everything they’ve ever wanted, things come so easily for them. They’ve either got a great job or their husband does, they’ve got a nice car, they’ve got looks, they’ve got the brains and they’ve got their life plans set out and have everything figured out. Me? I can’t even stand to look in the mirror let alone stand the fact that other people have to put up looking at me when I walk into a room.

I’m such a disgusting pig!

I can’t smile and be truthful at the same time. Perhaps I’m supposed to feel this way all the time. I’m supposed to be that girl who sits at home with her husband and does nothing with her life except take care of her husband and child.

That’s me.